7 weeks

My baby girl is 7 weeks old. I can't believe how fast time has gone by. On Christmas eve she will be 2 months old. It's amazing to see how in a short time so many things change. She's smiling now, and following sounds with her eyes. It's great to watch her hear her dad's voice and want to follow it. She has totally changed our world in such a good way. She's the biggest blessing! I can't wait to watch her grow up. I just hope it doesn't all fly by like this.

My Baby Girl

So it finally happened, my daughter is here! Being a mom is well different. There are so many emotions that come with that word MOM. It's crazy, scary, and exciting that it's a reality. I'm so amazed at how perfect she is. God is so good!!! I can't believe that He's entrusting this little person to me and Joe. Our job now is to raise her the best we can. I think about the future, but for now I'm trying to relish how small she is and how amazing the moment she came into the world was.

Rant

This is one of those mornings I need to remember that God is in control. He told me not to worry about where food or money will come from, He said I had favor yet I'm fretting over and over. Lord help me have FAITH!!!!

False Alarm

Had a false alarm on Sunday. I was really hoping it was the real thing. Hopefully I will go into labor in the next 3 weeks!!!

Sad Day

Today has been a sad day. Sad because we went to our friends baby's funeral. Lillyana was born Friday, August 22. She was born with a condition called Trisomy 13. Babies that are born with this condition usually don't make it past the first 48 hours, and if they do most of them don't make it to their first birthday. Her parents and our friends Joe and Becca have had hope from the moment they found out. Hope that God would do a miracle in Lillyana's life. Becca, and I, along with another friend of ours became pregnant within weeks of each other, and have compared aches, pains, sickness, and all the other crazy things that happen to your body when you are pregnant. I remember when they found out about her condition, and all the sadness that came along with it. Due to the fact that Becca developed high blood pressure Lillyana was born in August instead of October. I can tell you that from the beginning she beat the odds. She was so much healthier than doctors expected her to be. They had said she would only live 2 hours after birth, but they were so wrong! Tests were run and it turned out that her brain, lungs, and kidneys were in full working order. She did have a heart condition, but it was minor. Since she was 6 weeks early she was in NICU and on a respirator. I remember going into the NICU the day after she was born to see her. Her eyes were covered because she was jaundiced and they had a light on her. My initial thought was that she looked big, she didn't look like a frail premie. She looked big for 4 pounds even though she was small. I remember Joe her dad was there with me, and while we were in there she started crying. I will never forget the picture of Joe taking her hand, her grabbing on to his finger, and him telling her "Don't cry baby, daddy is here." At that moment I had to walk away. The next day around noon she passed away. Today Pastor David reminded us that she is in a better place, that she is looking at her parents saying I'm well. I try to put myself in their shoes, and wonder if I would have been as strong as they've been. The thought of losing this child that I've carried in my belly, felt move, and have really bonded with makes just break down in tears. I can't imagine going through it knowing that my baby wasn't going to make it. I pray that in the time that now comes that we (my husband and I) can be there for them, just like the rest of our friends. We've rallied around them and shown them we are here for them. I pray that they not lose their faith, but that this makes them stronger. Even though Lillyana's life was short, she made a big impression, and she touched many people's lives. I hope that we never forget the value of life and how precious it truly is.

Green River

This past weekend my husband and I and several friends spent the weekend at Green River. I don't have any pictures because I thought I had forgotten my camera, it turns out it was in my purse the whole time. Now I have to ask my friends to email me some pics. It was actually one of the most relaxing things I've ever done in my life! It was great to be able to kickback and relax with good friends. The lake was awesome!!! It was green (hence the name Green River), but the water felt so good during those hot days. We did get sunburned, but I think it was definately worth it. Joe got to do some fishing. Thank God for that, because it turns out he had kept worms in my refrigerator for this trip! Jaelie had her first jet ski ride. Yup, I was finally able to convince my husband that I would be ok to ride the jet ski. It was quite a lot of fun. It was so fun to spend the weekend with other fellow pregnant friends and 2 babies, it made it a very interesting time. I'm so thankful that we have such generous friends, that would allow us to come and invade their space. When we left everyone was talking about making it a yearly trip. I'm totally up for that one.

Randomness

I realize that I haven't blogged in a long time. My sisters have been asking for some new blogs and finally I am sitting down to do just that. Actually it's because I remembered that they asked!

So far things are going well. I have 10 weeks left before Jaelie Anaya makes her appearance. As the my due date gets closer and closer the more excited and nervous I become. Not only do I ask myself what she's going to look like or who's personality is she going to have, I wonder what kind of parents we'll be. I guess we'll find out in 10 weeks.

On a different subject, I was very excited this morning because I found a good Latin music station on Itunes. Now I just have to figure out how I can listen to it all day without leaving the upstairs open to the cats. I know it sounds goofy, but now that I'm going to be have a child and she's not going to grow up in the most Hispanic of places I want her to show her everything I can. I know a Latin station sounds like a silly thing, but being that now in my belly she starts moving as soon as she hears any type of music I want her to be able to know and recognize the music that is a part of our culture. I told Joe we were going to need to move to a city with a decent Latin station and he told me we'd just get satellite radio, I think now he'll be happy we can find it online :-)

New things

Well I'm 5 months pregnant, very close to 6. I can't believe that time has gone by so fast and in 3 months I'll finally get to meet this little girl in my belly. Right now life is pretty good. I no longer have a pick line, but I am on permanent bed rest until she's born. There could be worse things going on then not being able to go to work, so I am counting my blessings.

Prego Update

So I'm still on IV. Yesterday I went to the hospital and they inserted a pick line. So now I have a permanent iv thing in my arm, at least for the time being. I've also been put on medical leave. It's good to be home and relax or deal with being sick at home and not having to worry about calling in or doing a bad job at work. We'll see what happens now.

Pregnancy Blog

I know I haven't blogged in a really long time. I honestly haven't had the energy or the desire to do much lately. Well for last 9 weeks. So today I am 15 weeks and 2 days pregnant. I can say that this has been one of the hardest things I've ever experienced. Now let me just say that this is one thing that I've always wanted to be a mom. Unfortunately this whole experience has been difficult. I think in your head you think it's going to go one way and then reality sets in. I'm now on my second stint on an IV. It's extremely frustrating, because there's nothing you can do to make it better. The doctor just says eat what you can, but um what if you can't eat anything??? Then what do you do? I had about 2 of 3 days were I felt fine, and I thought yes I'm finally over this. Now it's come back with a vengeance. I'm ready to be able to enjoy this pregnancy and I hope that it happens soon.

Pregnancy

Well I am almost on my 7th week of pregnancy. It will be official on Monday. To say that this is completely without emotion is so not correct. At first I didn't feel anything at all. Now well lets just say that's not the case. First of all I have this nausousness that does not go away. I have found out that the baby does not like certain things. Those things being Fast food (especially Taco Bell), cream of broccoli soup, oatmeal (at least the fake kind you add water to). I think that sums it up so far. The baby does like fruit and pancakes. Pizza is not at the top of the list either. This is such a learning experience. I did tell my husband that I concede and we will only have 2 kids. I can't imagine going thru this 3 times, 2 of those times with children. We'll see how it goes from here. I have to wait one more week to go to the doctor. :-(

I'm Pregnant!!!

Yes!!! I'm pregnant, I'm 4 weeks along! I can't believe it. Right now it doesn't feel real. I took a pregnancy test and it had 2 lines!!! I always wondered how I would react the day this happened. Honestly, I couldn't believe it. It was so surreal. But now the reality is that in October I'm going to be a mom! Oh my goodness I'm so happy I could burst!!

Romantic Weekend

My husband and I just got back from an awesome weekend away. I didn't even realize I needed a vacation until we were there relaxing. It was so much fun to just hang out with my husband and noone else. we decided that we are going to need to do that more often. Being away from the business of life helps you concentrate on each other. I love my husband so much!!!!! Anyway Gatlinburg was a blast!

Monday Night

It's Monday night and I'm listening to Joe play Playstation 2 fun fun. Not much to say, but a lot to say at the same time. Oh well maybe tomorrow....

You Have to Lose to Win

So this week my baby sister had her heart broken. I spent the day with her Tuesday and I spent the day doing my best to make her feel better. Listening to her cry her heart out and tell me what happened took me back to a time when the same thing happened to me. I remembered exactly how I felt at that time and the things that I did that to deal with it all. It's awful when you think you know how your life is going to go and then it doesn't work out that way. Then I remembered, that unfortunately that's life. God throws things like this our way to make us stronger, to build us up on our faith, and our complete dependance on HIM. Only He knows why he allows these things to happen. I remember having my heart broken and crying out asking why. Now 6 years later I see why. I know that if I would have married that boy, yes boy because we were so young I would have missed out on the some of the greatest moments in my life. This break up began the cycle which has made my life what it is today and made me the woman I am today. I thank God for that painful moment, and everything that came after it. Because of this experience which began the chain of events that has lead me to this point in my life. I have learned to depend on God, trust in him, and realize that only HE will always be there. To my bumblebee I have to say to be strong! You are an amazing woman, and God is going to use this experience to make you stronger, bolder, and more dependent on Him. Never look at is as you have lost, because thru this you will win. The chain of events that this has started will only shape you more into the woman that He wants you to be. Just remember that if this is it, things will turn around. If not, then know there is a man out there that God will bring who will love you like no one has ever loved you, and at that moment you will thank God for this moment you are living today. Look at me now and remember that!

Weekend

This weekend is almost over!!! That means I have to work tomorrow :-(

Average Day, Not So Average Night

Today is was an average day, and now an average night. I worked a long shift of 8-7, came home and made dinner with my husband. Now I am sitting here blogging, and he is watching Johnny Zigler preach. As I've been sitting here goofing off on Myspace and Facebook, I'm thinking of today. There was a moment this evening that my husband told me something that happened to him at work today that made me angry. I mean really angry! I automatically asked him if he had responded. He said no that he had not, that he had bitten his tongue. Automatically, I thought of like 10 things I would have said. I even told my husband that I would have made the person feel 2 feet tall. I realized that I need to learn that getting angry doesn't solve anything, neither does putting people down, or making them feel worthless because they said something that made you angry. I'm glad that I didn't say the things I was thinking out loud! But I wonder how many people say exactly what they are thinking in moments like this? How many ugly situations, arguments, fights, feuds, and so much more that we could avoid? How many Christians like me would have automatically bitten back? What if the person wasn't saved and they knew you were a Christian, it's something to think about. So my day was average, but my night is not. I realize now that I need to give this to the Lord. I need to pray that he helps me control my THOUGHTS. I'm good at controling my tongue, but my thoughts not so much. Because I didn't tell Joe what I was thinking, but oh man if he could have read my mind! It's time for me to pray that in 2008 my thoughts change. This has not been an average night!

Disappointed

So I was hoping to be pregnant this month. I'm disappionted today because it's not the case. I know that I can't plan my life and expect things to happen exactly when I want them to. The main conselation is that I know that we can try again next month, and the month after that. I'm just bummed, really bummed....

Miracles Do Happen

So this week Joe and I saw God work in our lives. We've prayed and we were really scared about what was going to happen.I kept asking God where he was and why wasn't he listening. I kept saying are you just going to leave us here to figure it out on our own? Well He came thru. I just want to say that I don't always have as much faith as I should. But what happened was a miracle, something only God could make happen.

Dinner Lift

Today we had 4 great friends over for dinner. It's great sitting and watching how much things have changed. God has given us some amazing friends! Friends that I don't think my husband and I ever thought we would have. There were the guys goofing off, talking about silly things, and us girls being practical. I was sitting there hearing the talking and laughing thinking about how much our conversations have changed over the past year or so. We went from weddings now to babies. Our lives are changing and our friendships are evolving. I pray that throughout this year, our friendships grow. I love these people!!! They bring out so many good things in us. I love how John and Daniel have lifted my husband up. They are starting to help him understand what God has called him to be. I love listening to the 3 of them and their other guy friends get together and discuss The Word. I see these guys that are truly seeking out the heart of God. The girls are so different we are quiet, yet we sit and will talk about everything and anything. I have prayed for and been prayed for by these girls. We are there for each other. We have all truly become a family. I wish that everyone in the world could experience this. Friendships, Godly friendships are so important. I hope that we keep having these random dinners. I came home stressed and tired. Now I feel refreshed and just plain happy. Good friends lift you up, even when they don't realize that they are doing any lifting.

First Blog

So this is my very first blog. We shall see how this blogging goes. The only thing I can say is that I read a few people's blogs and they are pretty interesting, entertaining, funny, and many other things. I always have ideas and opinions in my head. I hope that I actually take the time to write them all out. Here goes to blogging!!